Poker on me.

So I'm competetive. So what. I just happen to like to win, that's all. It's not like I get all upset and pout when I lose...Oh wait, I do.

This Saturday there was a small Hold Em "Tournament" at my house. It so happened that I didn't win...not only did I not win, but I didn't come close. Looking back, I made a few mistakes over-playing some mediocre cards, but all in all, I didn' t have much to work with.

At the end...and how un-magnificent could it be. Dealt 2-4 off suit, meeting the big blind put me all in. The board didn't look great, but I made my 4's. The other two players remaining in reveal their cards..."Queen High," says Brandon. "Pair of Threes," says Magee. I jump in -- "Oh baby, pair of fours!" While magee is correcting his error, "I mean pair of Tens." This means I lose the hand, and my stack, even though he mis-spoke. There wasn't enough in the pot to do me much good, I would have still been clinging to life...I may have had four hands left to wait.

But OH, did I pout. I sat there fuming while the others played. I became the designated dealer, piping in random comments about how much it sucks to lose.

But I got over it, I always do.

So what's to be done? Can I really change this side of myself? We have all had friends who get really upset about nothing in particular and punch walls, throw controllers, but my affliction wasn't much like that. I just get really mean. That's just as stupid.

I guess I'll just have to win from now on.

~OR~

Maybe not allowing pride to enter the situation in the first place would be a better idea. With poker, I think I should win, because that is what I've always done. Until recently, I hadn't lost consistently at poker, ever. Now I'm just average. I either need to improve my game, or expect to lose every now and again...and enjoy the ride.

Saturday night was one of the more interesting I've had this year...being so busy with school/work/parenting I've had little time for fun. This was fun. I had "the boys" over, we laughed, talked, and did something which I enjoy. So it should be remembered that way. And so it is.